It's sappy but I was trying to get into the characters mind, and figure out what they think. My trip into Shishiwakamaru's personality.

No warnings on this one, it's short sweet and to the point. I kinda felt happy writing this. I needed a break and I didn't want to delve into my other piece. I want a finished fic up here. I promise I'll add onto the crossover sometime!

-- FONDNESS --

I still remember it like it was yesterday. I was always an arrogant bastard, I know it, I still am. It's part of who I am. And that day was no different. I shift my feet, humanoid feet and make my way through the trees. Yes, ever since the Makai Bujutsukai I've stayed in this form. It is the form most like hers. My opponent, my teacher, the only human who has gained my respect. I brush a frond of pine needles out of my way as I trudge on, my zori making soft padding noises in the pine-laden forest floor. My mind drifts as I let the branch snap back into place behind me.

I've lived for how long now? It's been many hundreds of years, so many I've forgotten. My mind lapses back to the Ankoku Bujutsukai. I'd sent Kuwabara into a void and my next opponent was missing. Fuukumen. The little guy had tried to take her place, charred as he was. I might have been able to take him on. In that condition. I was so self assured. I remember him stopping and turning. Fuukumen had returned. They watch each other for a moment then the masked fighter hops onto the arena. I was so angry. I remembered how much power had emanated from the little figure that stood in front of me. In previous battles, the power had positively throbbed. But at this point, standing in front of me was what seemed to be a normal human. Little if any power seemed present in the small figure. Angry' yes I was very angry. I tried to get Fuukumen disqualified. How dare they stick in a pinch hitter. To take ME so lightly. It was a crime! I deserved a good fight. Not this puny little sacrifice that stood before me now. I had watched with distaste the elderly little woman that stood before me. And Toguro had said that she was indeed the person from before.

Oh how I thought he was lying. Everyone was out to get me. They all took me too lightly. All these bitter thoughts running through my mind. I was a powerful demon and a samurai at that. How could they be so disrespectful? So crass? I had nearly shaken with anger. But she stood and watched me with those eyes. Totally calm, cool and collected. She has always been that way. Every time I see her she looks so confident. Not arrogant, just ' her.

We had fought. I knew I had the upper hand. She was a mere human, I had so much power. So I sent it at her. And she blocked it. Gathered up my strength and sent it back at me. I was surprised. So I attacked again. This time at full power, no one makes a fool out of Shishiwakamaru. No old woman will stand there and look so calm, then injure me. I would not allow it. So I had gathered my strength. I went all out, my best attack and she would not get away. I made sure of that. A wall of power, boxing her in. I would kill her and get rid of the ugly body I saw in front of me. So with full power I attacked. And those eyes. Calm eyes, closed. They closed and she took everything I had thrown at her. As she took it all in, she changed. It was amazing, like watching a butterfly open it's wings for the first time. She was beautiful, and strong and she opened her eyes and fixed me with that look. I could only watch in awe and surprise as she threw it all back at me.

Perhaps it was the strength of the blow, or maybe it was something else. My chest constricted as I hit the arena floor. That young, beautiful human. I wanted her to be mine. As the arena went black before my eyes and I felt my head hit the ground, I knew that I would do anything to be with her.

So I joined up with Suzuki and the rest. We trained under her for the Makai fight. Every second of every lesson, I watched her. My pride would not let me be caught admiring her so I only snuck glances. And when she spoke to me she had my full attention. I trained in my demon form. It has more power. She never seemed to mind that form. But she never really took extra notice of me. Did she think I was kidding when I said I liked her? Perhaps. She is hard to read. That same expression. I'm so used to it. I've grown to yearn for it. And hate it.

I had lost in the Makai Bujutsukai. I only made it through one round. Another hatchet mark on my waning pride. I couldn't go back to her after being so quickly defeated. I could barely face myself, much less her. So I had stayed in Makai. I saw Hiei once. The one who might have fought me. He works under Mukuro now and they say the two are very close. Mukuro lets him into her chambers. Very few make it into her chambers and live to tell about it. Perhaps I couldn't have defeated him.

I trained, trying to gain some strength. Three years it's been since the Makai Bujutsukai. I've trained in the Makai wilderness. And now I'm here. Walking through these woods again. I reach a clearing and see stone steps, beginning to take them up the mountain. It's been three years. Yuusuke is back here somewhere. I had seen him before he left the Makai. He was eager to get back to his woman. He will always seem a child to me. Though I know he's more powerful than nearly every other being in existence. His eyes lit up as he gestured wildly telling me about some human custom called a wedding. The woman he'd promised to come back to was waiting and he would make her happy.

I will have to find out about this custom. But it didn't sound like anything I would enjoy. I can't understand how something, that sounded so stiff and constricting could be something a wild kid like him, could look forward to with such a light behind his eyes. But I could understand his excitement. Going back to this human that he wants to be with. As Yuusuke described his woman, I found myself thinking about her. Wavy pink hair, petite form, powerful, but mostly her eyes. And that look she had burned into my memory. Cool, calm and collected. That is her essence. Yuusuke had left. I had followed a few months later.

And now here I am. I continue my steps. Finally reaching the top to see a Japanese dojo spread out before me. Quiet save the birds chirping and cicada's buzzing. I had always enjoyed the peacefulness this place emanated. Like the look that I can't forget. It has the same characteristic calmness, serenity. I trail my hand along the rail as I make my way up the steps to the door.

I stop in my tracks as the door slides open with a soft 'shhhhht' and I am looking into those eyes once more. She is old again. Humans age so quickly I look back into her eyes not speaking yet. She steps back allowing me room to enter her home. And I bow in thanks, slipping my zori off my feet and entering, as I turn back to her she steps forward. I blink for a moment as her form wavers and I see her hair gain more color, her face grow younger. And those same eyes that she's always had. She looks up at me and I look down at her.

'Would you care for some tea?' she asks as though nothing has changed.

I smile and kneel. 'I would like that very much.'